Thursday, September 2, 2010
Old People, Racism, and LOST
I have just decided that old people do not need to hear. They have had sixty years to have conversations and say what they want, and now that time has passed. Let's take hearing aids off the market for good--at least for the elderly. They are just going to watch the news and say something racist about the president anyway. Take it easy, mad old people.
Hearing aids are a way to give people back something that they lost. Did you ever see that show LOST? It was weird. Thus, hearing aids are weird, and no one needs to buy them--just like no one needed to watch LOST. Do you think old people would watch that show? No, they just watch The History Channel and soap operas--they are hardly enriching their lives (they are only watching histories so they can critique them and say what really happened--which is probably just something racist).
Even in a place like Mount Vernon IL--a place that sounds as if only old people live there--we should stop producing hearing aids. There is enough talking in the world already without bringing back all of the people who nature forced to stop. What's next, bringing back the dead? Sick.